News Stories

News Categories

Eleven things that will happen in the Premier League this weekend

We’re expecting Jose Mourinho to throw his toys out of the pram yet again on Saturday

Another exciting round of Premier League matches this weekend and we’re predicting the following things to happen:

1. Jose Mourinho will sidestep the “Elephant in the Roon”
The classless Manchester United manager is happy to criticise certain players in his squad (Hi Luke Shaw) although he won’t have a bad word said about his captain.

So unless Wayne Rooney produces an unlikely performance of high quality, expect him to fix any interviewer with a hard stare and some pseudo-bullshit if the question of Rooney’s selection rears its ugly head.

2. Leicester will ask United questions
Such as “why are you so disjointed?” and “why is Rooney still playing in the team”. Islam Slimani could be a real menace along with the familiar duo of Riyad Mahrez and Jamie Vardy. The Foxes will defend a high line and go for the jugular.

3. Manchester City will blow Swansea away…
Like they have against every other Premier League opponent this season. Sergio Aguero is back from suspension and raring to go.

4….leading to the dismissal of Francesco Guidolin
There’s been a big gamble on Guido this week in the Premier League Sack Race market and there’s rumours of Ryan Giggs (!) taking over at the Liberty Stadium.

5. Yaya Toure won’t be in the Manchester City squad
His clown of an agent has effectively ended Toure’s City career which was probably over already.

6. Stoke v West Brom will be tighter than a duck’s bottom
Mark Hughes needs to go back to defensive basics. Which is ironically what Tony Pulis did when he was at Stoke. So we might be blessed with one goal if we’re lucky.

7. But Hughes will be baffled by his team’s defending / refereeing decision
Hughes couldn’t find too much fault with the referee last weekend as Palace won 4-1 although the arbiters have apparently been against them in practically every other match. We’re looking forward to him opening the excuse book again should the Potters fail.

8. The sieve-like Chelsea defence will concede…
Antonio Conte was supposed to build a winning defence but that hasn’t been in evidence and Alexis Sanchez will be licking his lips at the prospect of facing a Chelsea rearguard without John Terry.

9…although Diego Costa will find the net
Costa is scoring in every match right now. He seems to have calmed down (a little bit) and has so far dodged a red card or too many controversial incidents.

10. West Ham will continue to struggle at their new ground
Lovely to see the Hammers flailing considering they got a free ground from the tax-payer and we’re expecting Charlie Austin and the Saints to cause more supporter unrest.

11. Burnley will continue to struggle at their old ground

The Clarets are looking like relegation material already and the arrival of a vibrant Watford could cause problems for a side who haven’t changed enough to make a fist of staying up.

All odds were correct at time of posting.

Leave a Reply